It’s official. The Amsterdam borough council of Oud-Zuid prefers copulating couples in the open air to dog mess. At least, that appears to be the situation, according to today’s Telegraaf.

The paper says that new rules being drawn up to cover the city’s famous Vondel (fondle?) park would allow cruising and sex in public but introduces fines for people who fail to clear up the mess their dogs leave behind.
Cruising, suggests council executive Paul van Grieken, is a fact of life. ‘So why try to control something which is not controllable, creates little hindrance to other park users and gives a lot of pleasure to a certain group,’ Van Grieken tells the paper.
Of course, he goes on, there will have to be tough rules and cruisers will have to clear up their own mess. Nor should ‘it’ happen near children’s playgrounds.
In fact, the park’s splendid Rosarium is the popular cruising area, according to the Parool, so flower-lovers beware.
The bylaws are currently in draft form and still have to be discussed and amended by the rest of the councillors.
Doubtless the good burghers of Oud-Zuid will chuck Van Grieken’s suggestions in the rubbish bin where they belong – alongside the little plastic bags of dog mess and other things. Incidentally, Van Grieken is also in charge of the district’s waste disposal.